i wish people would stop and think for a while.
i'm still appaled by the fact that after years and decades and centuries, people never learn. we're still making war, not peace.
in the past, people conquer for territory. now they conquer for resources.
i mean, i know human nature never change that much and that we're still that selfish and self-interested, but hey people are freaking dying every.single.day, sometimes for a cause they're not interested in.
so you're sacrificing people in the name of what?
sure you'd say they're fighting for freedom, equality, democracy and those fancy names.
but really, aint you fighting for resources to futher your self interest?
its easy to say go to war when those soldiers are not your children. but do you realise that they are the future of you?
if you're not trying to make the world a better place then please, dont play the political game. The stakes are way too high, and same goes to the responsibilty that comes with it.we're not your chances.neither are we your pawns. We only live once.

i'm sorry i'm such a bad lover.
i miss you plenty

seriously all that's in my mind right now is NGOs in Bangladesh and democracy in Singapore. Not exactly the most pleasant topics.
Studying politics, looking at the forests instead of the tree, they've made me more sceptical than ever. I have come to realise that really, the world is such a screwed up place.
But please dont put all the blame on politicians. Admitedly power corrupts, but really, alot of those in power are just trying to make this place alittle better.
I hope I can be the latter in time to come.

just wrote two pages worth of why microcredit by ngos are flawed. my faith for a better world just decreased further :(

"I have a partner,yes," he admits. He makes a serious face and eats a clam. "It's not the passionate, stormy love you find in a Puccini opera or anything. We keep a careful distance from each oher. We don't get together that often, but we do understand each other at a deep, basic level.
Murakami- Kafka on the Shore

admitting that a relationship is flawed is so much better than deceiving the world and yourself that you have a perfect relationship.
been thinking alot.
its not even that i dont realise i deserve better.
its just that i can never phantom the thought of living without you.
i've been thinking of you on a daily basis i cant not think about you.it's a habit i've yet to break.


If you love someone, ask him for nothing. Don’t hold him from his destiny. Don’t keep him from going off in search of his own answers. Don’t ask him for commitment. You will know commitment is real when it is something given willingly, and not as something obligatory. Don’t ask him for promises. If you are patient, if you have faith, you will know in your heart when the right time for promises has come. And when that time arrives, then you will see that you have both lost nothing by setting each other free, and have instead gained a richer,fuller life, a wealth of experiences, and a stronger certainty of your desires.

But should he not return to you, then life hasn’t cheated you because no promises were broken. Your bitterness will not last long, and you will feel thankful and blessed that at the very least, this beautiful soul has colored your life, that knowing him has already made life infinitely more meaningful.

By setting a person free, you run a risk of him not returning. But always remember that you found him beautiful precisely because he was free. People are like sunlight. You can feel their warmth, and their glow, but you can’t hold them in your hand and keep them with you forever. People choose to stay. But a choice is made more meaningful when it is made despite so many other options.
— Ala Paredes (via themorninglight)

"If nothing else, I’ve realized who I can count on. The friends who can read my mind and finish my sentence. who call me in the middle of a text message, or answer my question before I ask it, who tell me what’s going on in my crazy head."
you know who you are <3

"am i neglecting you?"

when i ask you that, i need you to tell me the truth.
truth is, i dont make the best decisions all the time. i do make bad choices, bad judgments. i'm not all the time rational, i'm emotional and passionate. and most of the time i trust my heart rather than my brain.
but i do miss you. even though i try and deny it all the time.
if i dont miss you then why am i feeling this way?
your one touch one look one kiss can change my decision, thats how much you mean to me now.
maybe in a couple weeks/months/years dynamic of our relation will change, but for now, please stand by me.

okay so maybe cutting bangs wasnt such a disaster after all :)

two polsci essays to write, one huge termpaper to research, one forum to attend, two scary injections, meetup with van to discuss getaway, weekly readings plus my own readings to do, lim's dance perf on sunday. thats a pretty busy week ahead.
i'm not making up the fact that i'm busy.i just really am.that's school i guess
plus i need alot of sleep.
i'm not trying to say that pushing you away is right, i'm just saying that maybe we all need a little more breathing space sometimes.

Oh, by the way...

probably wont be keeping those bangs but yeah, i've just got to see how i look like with bangs. now i know.

"Michael, I'm happy here with you. You're happpy here with me. Isn't it true? It's a miracle we're here at all. Isn't that enough?"
I am silent for a while and concentrate on that. Yes, it is true, but no, it is not enough.
Vikram Seth: an Equal Music

i wish there were two me, that way maybe i wont sacrifice you that much. i'm sorry my priority now is not you, esp now that i'm 10x more motivated to study hard and get into a good school for sep. i'm sorry i'm spending so little time with you, but i'm not apologetic for my choice
iam/ we are both) selfish creatures, aint we?

did the recent japan tsunami make you rethink life?
yes we can make the grandest plan and dream, but life is vulnerable and unpredictable.
treasure what you have, before its too late.

reflective element in the mind and the element of irrational appetite.
because we're only human

some secret will break you apart. and what am i supposed to do when i only want the best for the ones i love?

"I took the good times, I'll take the bad times
I'll take you just the way you are"
Diana Krall: Just the way you are
i love waking up to beautiful music playing in my head.

needs more discipline,thinking out loud and caffeine to tide me through this crazy week.

Love is more than just companionship,is it?

would you choose a boring but stable and lasting relationship, or a roller-coaster passionate and unforgetable romance?

devoured murakami's norwegian woods for the second time, still loving it. the number of post-its say it all
not my favourite amongst his works, but its still good.
funny how the book that escalates a writer to fame is never my favourite. murakami's norwegian wood, coelho's alchemist, picoult's sister's keeper. they are all a decent good read, but not their best in my opinion.

"After a long time of watching the glittering rooftops and the smoke and the red dragonflies and other things, we had felt something warm and close, and we both probably wanted, half-consciously, to preserve that mood in some form. It was that kind of kiss. But as with all kisses, it was not without certain element of danger."
i'm pretty excited that norwegian wood is gonna be up on the big screen, but i'm also very afraid that it will dissapoint. there's really nothing like pyhsically reading the book and experiencing the magic.

i think i'm a drifter.
the kind where family and friends and probably lover can never tie me down, they'll just make me wanna come back to a place where i should belong.
but i'm still not ready to trade my freedom.not yet.

i wonder if you would fight for me as much as i fought for you.
i admit that i dont make the best of decisions all the time.
but even if you were a mistake, i would have repeated it all the time.
you opened up a whole new world for me without trying to smoulder or suffocate me.
thats really more than i could ever ask for.
why is time never on our side?

what is a good life?
aristotle defines it as either a contemplative or a political life.
i'm on the right track if thats true.